39

MybirthdayisintwodaysandIwillbe39yearsold.

There, I said it. I. will. be. thirty-nine. years. old.

I don't know why I find this particular birthday so upsetting. I think part of it is some deep down insecurity (gosh, ya' think?) about how women in their 40s are somehow less-than. That, as a woman, I'm done. I know that today, all sorts of women 40 and older are doing all sorts of things: having children, leading successful careers, running for president.

I'm not going to get all weirded-out, reflecting on what I have/haven't done. I like my life and I've done some good stuff and have some stuff I'd still like to do. I'm not planning on having children so I've been ignoring my biological clock for some time now. And I'm not 40 yet. Just very-close-to-40.

I remember, as a kid, how women my age and older were not treated very well. Lots of them got divorced or laid-off (or maybe it was just in all those movies and TV I saw in the '80s). I guess part of me thinks that bad stuff will happen to me just because I'm .... as old as I am.

Or, maybe I'm a bit down because I don't look as great as Catherine Zeta-Jones. She's 39 this year, too. (On second thought, she looks way older than me XD).

Maybe I need a personal trainer, personal chef, and plastic surgery like these other women have/had??

***Update** There's a link in the title. Go ahead and check out other 39ers.